Last month (yes, February was still last month. Just.), Billboard brought out their list of the top 50 sexiest songs.  Their all time number 1 was “Physical” by Olivia Newton-John.  That’s right.

I took major offense to this list.  It seemed to imply that in order for something to be sexy, it actually needed to be overtly and unavoidably about sex.  The top ten list included “Hot Stuff”, “Like a Virgin” and “Do You Think I’m Sexy”. NONE OF THOSE SONGS ARE SEXY.

They could have avoided this appalling travesty if they’d realised one simple fact: sexy songs are not necessarily songs about sex.  Or if they are, they aren’t songs with blatantly sexual lyrics. It’s like saying a micro-mini is sexier than a skirt with a long slit- when the elegance of the other, with its mere hint of sexiness, makes it a far sexier item of clothing.  Sometimes combination of music, voice and metaphor makes for a far sexier song than “Let’s Get It On”.

None of these songs made the list, and all of them are damn sexy:

Glory Box

Oh, the beat in this song.. and her voice… and the lyrics… and the combination of desperation and desire. THAT is sexy.

(Side note: I have ALWAYS wanted to sing this at Karaoke, but they never have it.  If you ever happen upon a Karaoke joint that does, please let me know)

More below the fold:

Zero 7

Clearly, I find downtempo stuff to be very sexy.

Dave Matthews Band
Crash Into Me

I like Dave Matthews, ok? Don’t pay me out.

Besides, this was the first song I ever found sexy, so it needs to be on the list.  Even if it’s not so subtle and, to be honest, a little creepy. But come on, if PHYSICAL is on the list, how is this not?!?!

Ryan Adams

Another one more obviously actually about sex, but at least he uses some metaphor…

And since there’s no video clip for this one, I’ll just HAVE to use a TWW fan vid. Damn.

Bon Iver
Creature Fear

I do think this song is deeply, deeply sexy.  Even though it’s kind of about uncertainty.

BTW, this video is kind of lame. Don’t watch it. Just listen.

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One Comment
March 31, 2010 4:38 pm

I like Dave Matthews Band too. Shhh don’t tell anyone!

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