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Tonight

Hello, my friends.

I was going to call you my naysayers, but I’m the naysayer (duh, Erin).  Or maybe I’m not.  Are you naysayees? I don’t know

Regardless, hello to everyone who reads my blog.

And even though only a few of you comment, I know you come and see me, and that’s wonderful.  I don’t care if I only get 20 hits a day, those 20 hits are 20 people who read my words, and that’s special to me.  So thank you.  I love, at the end of the day, knowing that a few things were read.  I used to have a much bigger audience when I was at Swans, but I had to write in a certain way and about certain things.  This is much better.

I am really tired tonight.

Do you know those days when the weight of a year or two suddenly places itself right atop your shoulders and you can’t move?  Well, that happened to me about 45 minutes ago.

And things are good.  No, things are great.  Uni is just wonderful, my friends are amazing, my family as dear as family can possibly be.

But I’m still tired.

A lot has happened since Naysayers began. I can’t believe it was once an optional extra.  I can hardly believe it was once on wordpress.com, even though that was only 3 months ago.  It’s such a big part of my life now.  I’ve hardly been able to write on here this week, and I feel as though I’ve been starved.

Can you believe it’s more than a year now since I started reading Ezra Klein.  No, more than a year.  That’s a long time.  I mean, not a long time, but a whole lot of posts.  I feel like Pavlov’s dog, conditioned to salivate when I hear the words “Health Care”.  But reading his words have added so much to my understanding and my thoughts.

What a year.

My degree is going wonderfully.  Tonight, we had an amazing lecturer come and speak to us about her course and her life.  She read us a poem she wrote.  She was so very interesting, and I’m thrilled to be taking her class in second semester.  Maybe it will lead to me turning my back on US Studies and instead focusing on K-Pop.

I doubt it.  But that would be very post-colonial.

There’s not much to say, really, and I’ve said lots of nothing at all.  But thank you.  Thank you for reading my blog.  For those of you who comment, please know I read and treasure every one.  I know this isn’t a place for intrigue or excitement: it’s just my little place in the literary world, and a place I love to call home.

And, with that, I’m going to share with you one of my favourite Sufjan songs, in honour of the almost-first-anniversary of Naysayers.   Naysayers, for those who don’t know, was named for a wonderful Sufjan Stevens song called, funnily enough, “All Good Naysayers, Speak Up!” (I’m sorry, that was the only Youtube clip I could find!!).  It’s one of my favourites and, of course, it’s in 5/4 time.  It seemed an appropriate title when I started the blog a year ago

But the song I wish to share is not AGNSU.  Rather, it’s a song that first broke my heart about a year ago, then broke it again in a whole new way.  Still, it’s a song I love very dearly.

Thanks to all of  you guys.

2 thoughts on “Tonight

  1. *reluctantly raises hand* 😛

    I don’t stop by here that often and kind of think it’s better that way as I’ve got a fairly low tolerance for the mind-numbing self-indulgence and that sort of stuff, but I thought you always seemed opinionated and at least tried very hard to stay informed, usually I don’t mind reading what you come up with even if I often disagree with it…heh.

    If that came across as patronizing, then my sincere apologies. Tired. Good luck with the Masters course!

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